We Need a Sarcasm Font

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People are saying we need a sarcasm font, and we do. But that’s not enough. We also need a hyperbole font, and an amphibole font, a just-kidding-around font, a totally sincere font (no, really!), a font for kidding on the square, a whimsical font, a font for pretending you believe something you really don’t, a font for a modest intro, and a font for the crushing conclusion. 

We need a reductio ad absurdum font, an ad hominem font, a begging-the-question font, and a straw-man font. We need a font for mild irony, and we need one for …heavy… irony. We need a patronizing font, a placating font, an impassioned font, an apathetic font. 

We need a font for knock-knock jokes, for I’m-the-Guys, and Little Willies. We need a font for quoting from Peanuts, the Simpsons, Monty Python, and They Might Be Giants. We need a font for quiet resignation, a font for defiance, and a font for feigned cluelessness.

We need a font for flat-out lying.

Some will say we should use words to convey these things, but the fact is we need all these fonts. We need them every bit as much as we need a sarcasm font.

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edited from my twitter